Since Raquel is now pregnant, Del Boy decides it's time to move up a gear in his life, and he finds another opportunity to be a millionaire when the Starlight Rooms, managed by an old acquaintance, Eric, needs a good act. Del believes that Raquel is perfect for the part, and they even talk about how her solicitors are trying to locate her ex-husband. Del then successfully convinces Raquel to marry him.
Later, at the Down by the Riverside Club, Del and Rodney meet Trigger's friend, Tony Angelino, the Singing Dustman, who has styled himself after Tom Jones and singing to various old women who lust for him. Del thinks that Tony would be the perfect singing partner for Raquel. He then gets Tony to sign a contract, as well as tell him all about the upcoming performance at the Starlight Rooms with Raquel. Tony agrees to do the performance, with Raquel as his partner, Del as their manager, and Rodney as their roadie. Tony warns Del that he can only sing certain songs, but Del reassures him that all will be fine.
The next day at the Nag's Head, Del learns that the Starlight Rooms are owned by a tough gangster named Eugene Macarthy, who nails people to doors when he isn't satisfied. And to make matters worse, tonight is his mother's 82nd birthday when Raquel and Tony sing.
That night, Del eventually makes it after being in court after being prosecuted for fly-pitching. Eric introduces Raquel, who starts singing Crying very well - at least until Tony takes the stage and sings along. Only then does it emerge why Tony only sings certain songs; he has a rhotacism, causing him to pronounce his R's incorrectly, making Crying sound more like Cwying. Del quickly leaves after the song is over, while Rodney applauds politely.
Back at Nelson Mandela House, Del is worried about what Eugene will do to him, until a fuming Raquel and a sniggering Rodney both enter. Raquel admits that she and Tony carried on with the performance, singing Please Welease Me, Congwatulations, and the Gween Gween Gwass of Home, followed by a medley of wock 'n' woll, so says Rodney.
Tony shows up for his money, and Del pays him, Raquel, and Rodney. Tony then talks about how he's got a lisp which prevents him from pronouncing his R's correctly, and that he only sings songs without any R's in them. With that said, Tony leaves, and Del gets a phone call from Eugene. But it is not all doom and gloom, as Eugene says that his mother thought Raquel and Tony's performance was the funniest thing she'd seen in her life, and he wants to book Tony and Raquel on a five-week contract.
Del Boy quickly calls Tony back from the balcony and tells him, "Hang about, Tony. I've got you some more bookings. Stick with me, son, I'll make you wich!"
Writer: Ray Butt
Director: Tony Dow
Producer: Gareth Gwenlan
Duration: 50 minutes
Airdate: January 13, 1996
Audience: Stage Play
- Del Boy
- [[Uncle Albert Trotter
- [[Tony MaCarthy
- Eugene Macarthy
- Despite Del's apparent success at the end of the episode, Tony is never mentioned again in the series and no details on any events which follow the episode in relation to Eugene's desire to secure Raquel on contract ever surface, but then again, isn't that what fan-fiction is for?
- While sat in the Nag's Head, Albert asks what Rodney did with his golden handshake after he accidentally quit working for Parry Print Ltd in "The Chance of a Lunchtime". Del says "He's kissed that all up the wall, ain't he?" But in "Miami Twice", Rodney receives his pension money from Alan.
- Del tells Raquel that his mother Joan died after his father Reg ran away, but in "A Losing Streak", Del told Rodney that Joan died before Reg ran away.
- When Del is in the Nag's Head and he's asking Mike for a drink, Raquel is sitting talking to Mike and she finishes her drink. Then, after a few moments, she's still got some drink left.
Previous episode: The Chance of a Lunchtime
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